Dear Diary,

Today, I lost my job as a full-time technician associate at the local Radio Shack for my “repetitive tendency to show up late, and subpar knowledge of basic job requirements.” It’s not my fault that my 1988 Associate’s degree in ‘electronics engineering’ from DeVry is outdated, maybe RadioShack should have provided me with some kind of training or at LEAST paid for me to attend a technical school. To hell with them.

 

Dear Diary,

Today, I saw an online advertisement for an opening at Best Buy’s Geek Squad, and figured I’d take a shot at this opportunity. I always thought driving around in those custom-painted Volkswagen Beetles would be pretty cool.

 

Dear Diary,

Today, I had my interview with “Terrence”, the Geek Squad manager, and was hired on the spot. Take that RadioShack! Terrence was THE man, we really bonded over blazin’ the same strain of sticky. I got my uniform, met the team, and was told I start tomorrow at 11:00AM sharp.

 

Dear Diary,

Today, our office received a call from an elderly woman 28 miles away who was experiencing issues connecting to her internet. Unfortunately for us, she had purchased an advanced protection plan, so we HAD to drive out and make it look like we wanted to help her.  None of us knew anything about routers, so we played nose goes to see who would be driving out.

I lost nose goes and was sent on my way.

 

Dear Diary,

Upon my journey to the customer’s residence, I got a text from Terrence. He had called in sick today and was wondering if I wanted to join in on a blaze sesh to break in his new bong. I was interested so I left the customer a voicemail that a serious family matter had popped up and I wouldn’t be able to make it. That was easy.

 

Dear Diary,

Today, a disgruntled customer came in to complain about a protection plan she had bought from us guaranteeing protection against damage. I told her she was going to need to pay $150 to process this claim as there was a recent change in policy. She started screaming at me that she wasn’t aware of such a processing fee when she was sold the plan, and also received no written notification of such change. I didn’t want to deal with her abuse, so I gave her our 1-800 number, and told her that was the best I could do. She continued with the verbal abuse calling us a fraudulent practice and reminded us of our horrible online reviews before storming out. “Wow” I said to myself, some people should really read the terms and conditions more closely.

 

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